To the A-Holes that Say:
"Life's Short, So Live Every Day Like It's Your Last Day"
To truly follow that mantra would be to quit your job, move to South America, blow all $400 left in your checking account on Spanish lessons, and rot alone and bankrupt on the beach until your final day comes. With life expectancy around 100, living EVERY day like it's your last would be exhausting, expensive, and downright irresponsible. So hang onto your job and your kids, and your retirement fund because we have a bunch of serious adventures you can have right now, without abandoning all notions of being an adult.
Go to your local shooting range
Visiting a shooting range does not obligate you to change your voter registration card; it's just fun to shoot stuff. If you've never been to a range before though, you might feel a little out of place, like showing up in Texas without a pointy pair of boots, but the gun community is very welcoming and you’d be shocked how eager gun nuts are to share their knowledge and passion for shootin’ stuff.
And if you've never shot before, don't worry! Shooting at a range is a lot like checking out a library book—you don’t have to prove to the librarian that you know how to read before they’ll let you check out a book; same is true for guns. They’ll walk you through everything you need to know to keep you and everyone around you safe, then they'll let you pay to shoot their guns. See what the entire South and the NRA are all so excited about. Need some help choosing a range, check out our post, 6 Shooting Ranges in the U.S. that will Make you Both Terrified and Proud to be an American.
Fly Somewhere, Just for the Weekend
“If you’re going to fly somewhere, you need to get your money’s worth or not fly at all.” Who the fuck came up with that?! If you’ve always wanted to see what Time Square looks like, fly there after work on Friday and make sure you’re back for work on Monday. Wanna swim with manta rays or see lava, fly to Hawaii for a couple days and do it. Flights are so cheap these days, you can get flights to Hawaii for a couple hundred bucks, you fly non-stop from San Francisco to Iceland for 100 bucks, so what’s stopping you? Don’t have a week to spare, who gives a shit. Go for the couple days you do have and start your adventure. Here are the websites I use for booking flights.
Speaking of Flights Somewhere...Pilot Somewhere
Every Groupon site is crawling with deals on flying lessons for around 100-200 bucks. They'll take you up in the sky and pass you the controls, so that when that fateful day comes where the stewardess runs out of the cockpit screaming, "The pilot is unconscious. Someone needs to land this plane!" you can unbuckle your seat belt and let them know, "I've had one hour of groupon flight lessons. I got this."
And if you're looking for an experience that will have you crapping yourself in the air, try an aerobatic flight experience--for around 200-300 bucks, you go up with a pilot who does loopy dee loops, barrel rolls, and free falls until you have nothing left to throw up.
Join the National Speleological Society. Huh?
That’s a fancy word for the national cave explorers club. There are clubs all over the country for people dedicated to looking for natural holes to climb in and out of. Sounds a little freudian perhaps, but these clubs come with perks, like trainings on safe cave exploring, proper equipment, and even access to secret caves the clubs don’t make known to the public. www.caves.org The speleological society organizes trips to well known caves as well as expeditions to find new ones and all experience levels are welcome.
Go skydiving
I’m embarrassed to include such a cliche adventure idea, but the point I want to make here is that if you've never been skydiving, it's easy to put it off, but it shouldn't be a big undertaking. Skydiving requires about as much planning as a $15 haircut. There’s no reason to put this off a second longer. Once you sign your life away, you’re in the hands of the experts; THEY fly the plane, THEY throw you out of the plane, THEY land the parachute. Literally, all you do is pay and sign the 20 page liability release form. So get on it!
Go Bungee Jumping
Unlike skydiving, you’re not strapped to anyone in bungee. The experts secure everything for you, but you stand alone on the edge of the platform; when you’re ready to jump, YOU jump. The only one responsible for the plunge is you.
James Scott, bungee master at the highest commercial bungee in North America had this to say about the empowering nature of bungee jumping, “I’ve jumped off this bridge 160 times and EVERY time I do, I’m scared. But when you go into a difficult job interview, or you’re scared to confront a bully or you’re worried about the next big step in your life, you’ll be able to say for the rest of your life, ‘I threw MYSELF off a 350 foot bridge. I survived that. I can do this.”
The fall is less than 5 seconds long. And at a little more than 100 bucks per jump, it’s some of the fastest money you can possibly spend, but it’s an experience that all the reading in the world can’t give you. So go check it out!
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