Top of our bucket list is to swim with Great White Sharks in Guadalupe Islands, Australia, and South Africa, but we've met lots of people in our travels that are terrified of sharks. With movies like Jaws and Sharknado and Jaws 2 and the straight to VHS and DVD Jaws 3—who wouldn’t be afraid of these deadly creatures?! What do they need all those teeth for if not to ravage defenseless humans?! Well we’re here to set the record straight.
The killer great white shark kills an average of about six humans per year, world wide. So across 7.4 billion people, that’s .00000008% of the world’s population that is in serious risk every day! While yes that is really scary, here are a few things that are even scarier!
DEATH BY COCONUT
Yes, you are 25 times more likely to be killed by a coconut than by a great white shark. Coconut trees can reach a staggering height of 100 feet and produce around 30 coconuts a year. At that height, the “killer fruit” weighing in at a whopping three pounds, has the capability of knocking your coconut right off your shoulders. And as if these deadly fruits weren’t dangerous enough on their own, Japanese soldiers during world war 2, weaponized the killer fruit by filling them with acid and grenades.
DEATH BY KILLER BED
If you’re climbing into bed thinking you’re safe, think again. You’re way safer climbing in with a great white shark than a soft tempurpedic. A whopping 75 times more likely to be killed falling out of bed than by a great white shark, better sleep with one eye open; whether you're tucked in or untucked, beds just simply aren't safe.
MAN’S BEST FRIEND, MORE LIKE MAN’S GREATEST TRAITOR
Over 4 million Americans are bitten by dogs each year in the United States alone and 20 to 30 of those attacks end in death. These snarling beasts are just looking for a reason—cross them, and you'll end up buried like a bone in the yard. Play it safe; get a pet plant, (but not a carnivorous one, those can be pretty risky too).
THE LEFT HANDED KILLER
If you’re left handed, it’s a wonder you’ve made it this far. Statistically speaking, you’re a disaster waiting to happen since you’re over 400 times more likely to be killed by using products made for right handed people, don’t you think you’ve pushed your luck far enough? Cash in, learn to be right handed and count your blessings.
Final Thoughts
Statistically speaking you’d have to be about the luckiest person on Earth to be among those few killed by great white sharks; they’re just not a real threat for people. If you want to protect yourself from real threats to your safety, just ensure that you never go outside because the list of real world threats out there are countless (wolves, car accidents, homicides, icicles, bees, to name a few) and of course, make sure you don’t stay indoors either because there are lots of deadly killers in there too (lead paint, black mold, asbestos, black widows, and most autoerotic asphyxiations happen indoors too). When it comes to your personal safety, it’s best to just play it safe and….